Voice Within: Empowering Professionals with Zeina Habib

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Zeina Habib Podcast.m4a

Transcript

Hi and welcome to the You World Order Showcase podcast. I'm Jill Hart, your host and with me today is Zeina. Habib. Is that right? OK, Zeina is a life coach and her passion lies in empowering results oriented professionals to enhance their communication skills and confidence. Her aim is to help you build meaningful connections to bring your.

Yep.

Innovative ideas to life and make and impact. Welcome to the shows and it's really great to have you here.

Thank you. It's great to be talking to you today.

So how did you get started in all of this? And did you grow up in Lebanon?

I did so. I was born, raised and uh, lived in Lebanon until I was 26. My original background. I was a civil engineer working in construction, and then somewhere along the line I felt like my industry was very male oriented. I was a bit getting. I was getting a bit taken by that.

It was affecting me. I was getting tired. There was just so much.

That felt different than my personality, so someone like directed me to communication training. And as I was taking the training, the coaches there were like you are good at that stuff. Do you wanna work with us? Do you wanna train with us? And I started training with them. Did my ICF certification to the US for people who don't know, that's the International Coaching Federation.

UM, that kind of regulates coaching here in the US. So did my certification move to the Masters in Belgium and then here in the States I still work in project management, but I have my own coaching business and I kind of developed it into being about.

Embodiment and mind work. So it's body mind connection works. How do we use our body? And you know what we feel in our body and how do we use our mindset and our thoughts to create the change we want to become more confident to be able to be better listeners, better communicators and grow in our careers and our personal lights.

I love that. So do you mostly work with professionals?

I would say 80 to 90% of my clientele is professionals, managers and like tech companies, biotech companies, and I've had a lot of also, you know, just women clients who are just looking to change their lives and are looking for someone to listen and guide. I would. I don't want to use the word.

Someone to listen and.

Help them figure things out on their.

You're kind of like a guide. Somebody once told me it was more like a Sherpa.

I think for me the reason I like, I mean I feel guide for me from my perspective makes me look like I have answers. Well, I really don't. I'm just kind of helping people piece things together. So I'm like the person.

Looking from far away into their life and just giving them the puzzle pieces to put in place. So that's why.

But they still have to put the puzzle together.

Yeah, exactly. Sometimes it's nice to have somebody come along and say, well, here's all the pieces.

Maybe you were missing this one, that's, you know, falling off the table and it's underneath and under your chair. The dogs chewed on pork, part of it. So it never really fits in the puzzle. Very.

Well, true.

As you could tell, I'm a puzzle affectionado affect all of those pictures back. There are puzzles.

They're beautiful. I love it.

I really enjoy them. So. So what is your? What is your coaching kind of look like?

So I would say I am someone who adapts to her client. Uh. While I work a lot with the body and metaphors and you know movement and sensation, I definitely take my client where they are, so I will listen. I'm very accepting, but I'm also challenging, so I tend to push my clients a bit to.

To do more rather than just sit with where they are. So I think the best answer to that is accepting challenging and body based.

OK. And do you incorporate dance into some of the stuff that you're doing? You're a dancer?

I am a dancer. I do incorporate a lot of movement and body sensation. It's more, you know, I believe that we embody new habits. So if someone wants to create a new habit, it happens in your body. You have to stop yourself from doing something or push yourself into action and everything is in the body and. And so we have to start believing.

Sorry, are we showing up the way we want to? Are we showing?

Up as like you.

Know open wanting that change or are there things that make us close up?

And that maybe we're showing up in a rushed way when we're trying to be patient, maybe we're leaning in when we should be leaning out or the other way around. And I think that helps a lot because sometimes it's hard to connect only with the logic of things and being in the body and acting through the body helps move things forward quicker.

Yeah, the whole mind, body connection thing. I think it's really important and we're just kind of now talking about it more publicly and it's being more.

Accepted generally accepted that instead of just living in our heads, which is, you know, when we go to school, it's training to live in your head.

Don't worry about your body. You have to ask permission to do anything with your body.

But we want you to just use your head and don't use it for daydreaming because Lord knows we don't have any unique ideas.

So. So the idea that you know your mind and your body are connected and there's a spiritual aspect to it. We're not just like mines or arms or feet or organs, we're we're whole beings and and being able to, you know.

Be in touch with the wholeness of our bodies is so important.

Oh, 100% agree with you and I I think you know.

I work with a lot of clients and one thing I always hear is I logically understand that, but I still can't feel it. Like you know you tell. So let's talk about something simple. When we talk about self love, everyone knows that. Yeah, I shouldn't be hating myself. And that's logical, you know, like they logically understand it. But to actually be able to.

Embody it, portray it, and feel it is another layer that.

As humans, we tend to shut down sometimes when things are too tough.

And also we have been trained for that. You know, we have been trained that we have to be always tough, that we have to be logical all the time. Well in reality most of the decisions around the world, most negotiations, most conversations are not just logical. People's needs come into place, people's bodies, people's identities, all of that shapes a lot of our decisions.

And when we've learned to put that aside, it's like we don't have the skills to create that change.

Yeah. And I think it's women. It's even more distinct because we're told, you know, there's something wrong.

With you from the top.

We're really.

Little we get that message. There's something wrong with you because you know you're so emotional or you're so you're have a day, a month when you just like not feeling it because you know women have different cycles. Guys have a cycle that's 12 hours long. Women it's 28 days and.

You can deny it all you want, but it impacts how you approach the world. We we roll on a monthly cycle. Men roll on, you know.

What was it last minute?

Yeah, definitely. And I don't, I mean you said it. I think the media, the way we were raised the impression, the social standards that we have have now been very supportive of that kind of advancement of of just feeling good in our bodies as women.

Yeah, and.

You know, I once was talking to somebody who was talking about. I just want to get to the point where I can be like a guy and walk out of the bathroom without a towel on. I'm like.

I never have, even when I was really young and I had a great body and I just like that was just never me. And maybe it's just who I am, but I have never met a guy who didn't think he was God's gift to the planet no matter what he looked like with his clothes on or off. I mean, they just they.

I don't know.

But it is, but they just don't seem to.

I mean, I've to be very honest. That's one other thing is I've seen the two extremes. I think it's more sometimes.

One thing about men is that they have been taught that they can't show emotions, so a lot of my clients who are men and come into sessions, they do feel those things. They do feel some sort of maybe it's different kind of in that inadequacies or different type of shame than women.

Too. It's just they have been taught not to show it. They have been taught that if they show it, it means that they are failure. So their perspective is very different and their insecurities are different. But while women tend to like show up as we're less, men tend to hide these things and show up as if they're more sometimes.

Maybe it's more of a tendency, but I've seen a lot of my clients that.

It's interesting because no matter this, you know the position, the age, the situation, everyone has something that they're struggling with and it's it's somehow comforting in the sense of no one's really alone, but it's also.

Oh yeah.

Sad because you know no one wants to see anyone struggling all the time.

That is so true. And you know as.

As a society, the the more we can help people heal from that which is really what you're all about and and have tools to appreciate.

The the struggles that they're going through and no one gets through childhood without trauma. I mean, it just doesn't happen. Quit blaming your parents. Just get on with.

Your life.

Everybody's been there, but you just.

If you have the tools and I think if everybody is working towards this, this common goal of of healing, it's just going to make the world so much better and so much richer because they'll each have their place and they can just be who they are instead of having to hide that thing that they're really uncomfortable.

About.

100% and the you know, one of my favorite writers, Bernie Brown talks about shame and she always says that shame thrives in secrecy. Once secrecy is removed, shame just falls apart, which is exactly what you're saying. When people show up when some one person says I felt that and the other says yeah, I know what you're talking about. And then another says the same.

Shame has no more space because there's so much compassion. There's people understanding each other and understanding that everyone has stuff. Days everyone goes through, you know, mental health issues, physical health issues, and that's normal and that's OK and we should be able to be there for each other.

Yeah, I I believe that so strongly and just just showing up for each other. The idea that you know.

You don't have to be better than everybody else at everything. You can be better at something than most people, and if you are, you should share that with others. And yeah, you should charge for it. But you should share.

But because charging is just an exchange of energy, there's you're you're helping somebody solve a problem, and that they have. And in exchange you're giving your time and your energy to them. So it should be, it should actually raise the global consciousness, the more transactions.

Like that, that are accomplished because you're going to deliver excellent results and they're going to get the results that they wanted. So I just think it.

We're selling used to be like this icky thing. I think it should just be celebrated and pushed forward and say yes, let's do this. Let's both get.

What we want?

And then let's make the world better.

You know it's.

Yeah. And you?

Know I I always had a I was one of the first people that had a very.

I wouldn't say negative, but just suspicious. Look on to sales and selling and still struggle with that. I'll be very honest with you, but I when I started doing you know, sometimes I do volunteer work or I work with some people for free for some reason. And I realized that when services are given for free, people don't.

Take it seriously.

Not just with me with themselves because they don't value you. They don't think that they're putting any value in it. And the moment it becomes a paid service, everyone thinks that if I'm putting money into this, I want to get something out of it. And you feel the more motivated, more likely to put in the work. And that makes me feel motivated, pushes me. And also, I mean.

They don't value it.

Paid work as long as you.

Not selling something in value like something that doesn't have value or you're trying to, you know.

Lie you.

You're trying to scam somebody.

Scam someone. As long as you're being yourself, and as long as you're only taking clients, that will actually benefit from you.

This is the best gift for both.

Parties.

And it just like is.

That you're both benefiting and it only can help everybody, everybody, not just the two of you, but everybody that's around you because you're going to learn something that's going to change the people's lives around you and make their lives better. And if you're in a company, you're going to change the company dynamics because you've changed.

Thanks.

Nothing ever stays the same, but if you if you work with intention to create a life that you want to live and in an environment that you want to be in, then it fixes the environment of those who are around you also and that.

Kind of.

Like magic, but not.

Like that kind of like magic.

So can I ask you some questions about Lebanon because I am really curious what was it like growing up there? And are your parents Lebanese and was it?

Was it a cultural thing for you to move to the United States and that's your country, or vice versa? Did you go over there as an American?

So no, I am originally purely Lebanese. My parents were raised and born there.

Both of them.

And I think it was. It was an interesting, I mean, as a culture, it's a very vibrant.

And also it's a high energy, so high energy in the positive and the negative sense kind of kind of culture and people are just so present for each other. So it's like community is always there. So there's a lot of community, sometimes it can be a bit too much in my own perspective, but it is there like you're never going to.

Not find someone to be there for you. Everyone is always there for everyone and that is beautiful.

UM, the difficulty in Lebanon is that the economy itself was based on exporting people, so people leave and then send money, you know, to their families and things like that. And I think from my perspective, I've always been very adventurous. I've always loved to meet new people travel, you know, understand new cultures. And the moment that happened, the moment I moved to Belgium and then later to the States.

Yeah.

I felt so much like myself.

12.

I did struggle for a while of like do I want to go back to Lebanon? Do you want to help my own people? But right now, you know, the economic political situation is a bit complicated for someone to be able to live a life. I mean, at least the way I want to. I think for me right now being here sounds like.

The better answer.

That's awesome. And you are a civil engineer.

Which is how did that look when you're over there? Because this is a real male dominated society.

Ohh yeah, I think even here I still do some project management work for construction. It is more male dominated but you can find the difference in that you like. You'll see, Superintendent. There are women and some people on site in Lebanon. It was stuff like there was this year where it was like the only woman on the job site among thirty men and it's.

Hmm.

I think it becomes very.

Like it's the kind of like, assertive or.

Or kind of like attacking mentality, where everyone's very loud all the time and I was able to make it through. I mean, the way my personality is based, I was able to make it through. I just think it took a lot of my energy. I think I got to a point where I'm like, I don't want this part of my personality to be so out of balance.

Be the part that's taking most energy. I think people are not used to seeing women in the construction world. People are not used to negotiating calmly sometimes.

It's just a very different rough world that from my perspective, didn't fit with who I wanted to be.

I can respect that. Thank you for sharing. I really appreciate that. So when you're doing your coaching, is it more one-on-one or is it groups? How does how does all that look?

So I do one-on-one coaching and then group trainings. I kind of have worked with both. I really love doing both. I prefer in person training just because I get to interact more, I get to move people around.

UM, but I do think that especially during the COVID nerra one-on-one coaching, especially online became very common and I think a lot of people got the courage to do it because they could do it from their own home, from their safety. No one had to feel like they were stepping into someone else's space. That helped a lot.

Or even it felt like, you know, approaching coaching became easier because they could just click a button on zoom and talk to someone instead of having to go through the effort of, like meeting someone or maybe taking a walk with them or sending in their office. For me, I think.

I mean, I don't know. I love both. I love training and I love one-on-one coaching. UM, I think you take more.

More value from doing a middle, like a mix of both. I think the group gives you support because you're not doing everything on your own. So there are other people working through it with you. But I think one-on-one allows people to dive deep into their own personal stuff rather than, you know, a general kind of.

Blank statement.

Right, right. That makes a lot of sense. So do you work mostly with corporations when you're doing group trainings?

Or do you? Is it strictly just like?

Just professionals, they they come to you because.

They're seeking help.

So most of my training have been through corporations. UM, I've done a few that were not, but most of them are through corporations. And then when it comes to one-on-one coaching, there's a lot of big associations right now that go to big companies, you know, the Disney, the LinkedIn of the world, and then they offer coaching for their clients. And there's so many coaches signed up, people will match with whoever they believe is a good match.

For them and then we end up working with them.

That's interesting. That's great. Great way to find people that have just like damming people on LinkedIn.

Yeah, that's. I will tell you this has been a struggle, I mean.

For me personally, having to put yourself out there and mark it while not feeling like.

Fraud somehow is is one of those things that I'm like, I can do this and it's been an interesting journey. I've been working through.

It is kind of.

Especially from working at home and I can relate to this too because I work from home.

And.

You know, I have my life and I love my life. It's it's really fun and I get to meet people from all over the world and talk to them, but they're all.

For the most part, sitting in.

Their house too.

Or their front yard.

And there it's just like.

We're just, we're just normal people. We all put our pants on one leg at a time and.

But we have these gifts that we're here to share with the world and you know.

We're grateful for the Internet that that these things can happen and the experiences can happen, and I don't. It's pretty cool.

Ohh yeah it is. I think. I mean, I got to coach people in like South Africa and Australia and the UK and I think you don't get.

To have that.

You know, experience. If it weren't for the Internet and all these big corporation and meeting different people, I think that is definitely a blessing.

Yeah, in the zoom it just lets you like meet together in the middle of.

Nothing, because it doesn't exist. And when we're talking to each other, but it doesn't actually exist as anything. Yeah, just kind of a miracle. I remember when I was young, we went to this museum and they had vision phones. Which one person would stand on one side of the wall and the other one would stand on the other. And it was kind of like zoom. You could see them.

Or, you know your cell phone. And this was back in the 60s maybe.

So it's been a minute and I mean there was when my bell was still the hand, there weren't even long cords. They were just like, you know, you you went to the wall and you stood there and you did your three minute call because God forbid you spend any more than 3 minutes.

On the telephone with anybody, your mother would come by and tell you to get off the phone. Somebody might be calling. It was before.

Call waiting even.

So it was so, so exciting to see that technology and now you know, we walk around with these little phones in our pockets and it's like we have the whole world at our fingertips.

Oops.

Yeah. And sometimes I wonder how much of you know how much our brain can handle that kind of new outlook on the world.

Yeah.

It's it's much faster. The the world is much faster than it used to be. There's there's not a lot of downtime because there's just so much to consume.

Just like it feels like you're busy all the time.

100% it's like you're consuming information. You're just like there's a lot. There's much more information than your brain can process, I think.

So how do you help people when you're coaching them?

I mean, I think one of the biggest thing is helping them understand what they need help with. I think a lot of people come to coaching with. I don't want to say the wrong goal, but the superficial goal and having coaching conversation helps them dive deep.

Into it, and then, you know, we discussed everything, behavior, thoughts, emotions. Sometimes people cry. Sometimes they express happiness, sometimes they, you know, process things. And at the end of each session, there's always an action plan. And for me, people go out with one small consistent thing to do. Like I think for me the biggest.

Biggest thing to do in a coaching session is to build new habits, so I don't want someone to leave and like my life changed. I want someone to leave and be I am doing this very small thing from now till a month.

Reading.

And then keep going at it, because habits change habits and create new behavior and create new personality. So I think it just becomes a process of each session, what worked, what didn't, maybe we start a habit that doesn't work and then we figure out why. And then we adjust it and then it turns into something that creates.

The person that they want to show up as.

That that.

And little habits are so powerful.

100% I think when I always tell my clients if you're coming here to get a miracle in two weeks, I'm the wrong quote for you.

It can happen quickly.

But it's usually like an iceberg. Most of the hard work has already been done, and they're just coming for a touch up because that's the only part that you see above the water.

Yeah.

And that's when it happens really fast. But there's there's a lot that you have to clean up before you can get to this major transformations in your life.

So I know on your website you have a resources tab, so you want to talk about what what's available over there for the listeners.

Of course. So I have a few of my old interviews with some tips on how to manage emotions, how to think through things.

UMI also have actually a course is only available in Arabic because I gave it an Arabic back then. Uh which is talking about emotional intelligence and coming soon probably within the next three weeks is gonna be.

Every workbook on self-awareness and listening to others and how we can, you know, understand where we are and that and how we can improve and all of that can be found on my website. I do have also a monthly newsletter just through what has been happening in my life and other people's lives and just a bit of some tips. So people can, you know, food for thoughts.

Oh, I love that.

And we'll put the link to your website in the show notes, but you want to just tell them what it is.

Yeah. So it's voice-within.com and then you can read it on there and just probably press.

Listen.

The link and.

It will take you to the website.

Perfect. This has been a lovely conversation. And so what's the one thing you hope the audience takes away from our conversation?

One of the biggest things for me, I always leave every coin with is practice is key. I think that's the biggest one. I think we tend to want to start something and then give up because we're not seeing results and I think.

Biggest strength for anyone is to learn how to practice, even if they're not seeing immediate results. Now. I'm not saying if you feel like you should pivot or you're failing that, you shouldn't change. But give yourself that space to keep trying and trying and practicing because practice creates results. You'll wake up when they.

Will be this.

Is a completely different embodiment that I haven't.

Seen or felt before, so just keep practicing and have that faith in yourself.

And look, look for the results, even though they might be small, just and be grateful for them. When you see that little little thing that just like oh wow.

That's so cool.

Recognize it, and the more you do that, the more your brain.

Turns on to, oh, we liked that. So we'll look for more evidence that this is working.

That's two more. I think gratitude is a big one that I'm glad you mentioned it because sometimes we tend to ignore the small signs and we want more and more and more well, appreciating those small signs does that. It pushes us to do better and create more.

For sure. Thank you for joining me.

Thank you so much for your time. It was great having a conversation with you.