Wave Melen – Crushing Financial Isolation with Heart

Hi and welcome to the You World Order Showcase podcast. Today we are talking with Wave Melen. She is on a mission to help people feel good about their finances. She does this by partnering with her clients for her heart centered radically authentic financial adventure where she empowers you to awaken.

Their inner dragon.

And crush financial isolation so you can be wild and free, not 2 words you hear together very often when it comes to finances, but I'm loving it. Welcome to the show Wave. I'm so excited to have you here.

Hello. Thank you.

So I was over on your website and I love the Unicorn references and the sparkliness. It's just like so refreshing to see this around finances because finances are one of those things that are just like.

It's like this dark box that hides in.

The corner in it.

Or the monster under.

Your bed because it always attacks us at night.

How did you get started?

In this and what are you doing?

And tell us all the stuff.

Sure. Yeah. Well, thank you so much. And I am so passionate about this topic. It definitely comes from a place of wanting to share what happened to me, what I discovered. And I can't wait to tell other people.

So this is perfect I.

I grew up wanting Legos and I got Barbies. And so I think my parents taught my brother how to like how finances work.

And I had no idea I entered my 20s, really confused about what Adulting was.

And it was also shocking because I realized that adulting now entailed 40 to 60 hour work weeks.

And I was devastated, even though I could work some of my passions, it felt really.

Really limiting that this was going to be my entire life.

And there's so much like excitement when you're like, I'm gonna grow up and be all these things, and then you get there and you're.

Like, wait, what? And I quickly entered $30,000 in debt.

Some of it was just consumer, some of it I think, just went to Amazon early on. Some of it went to schooling, you know, medical things that happen in life.

And it just quickly became a an out of control process and I had really no idea, I mean pretty much 0.

How it how it all worked and I had no interest.

It sounds like the most boring conversation I was going to have with anybody.

Yeah. And so the existential question though for me was going through this process of what like I have this one precious life and I want to live it so full.

But I keep running.

Into walls about how I can do that because.

I'm stuck at this job. I'm stuck under bosses who are mean or to you know, places that don't value you.

And that feeling it was, it was. So it was such a crisis moment.

I did this worksheet one day and it was like figure out what one word is important to you.

And I'm working it. I'm working it and then the word that illuminated at the bottom was sovereign.

And I was like, where is this word coming from? This is such a crazy word. UM and everything just clicked.

How do I become?

Like I have so much that I want to be and so authentic.

And I'm so far from that road. And so it started a journey. I realized that finances were actually.

Holding me back.

I tumbled into a world actually on Instagram. It's called the financial independence. Retire early community. So it stands for fire. I honestly was just clicking through it and it and it just resonated with me.

One thing that like I noticed was my brother was literally a financial analyst and had gone one complete direction and I remember conversation to him. My dad had over stocks.

And I remember asking my dad what a stock was one day.

And he was like, oh, you don't want.

To you don't want to worry about that kind of thing.

You know.

To me, I mean, I don't know if that's.

Like rings a bell.

It totally does. I grew up with two sisters and my dad was in the military, so he was gone a lot.

And my parents didn't talk about money. And you know, I just knew that I needed to get jobs. I started working when I was really young and but I just knew that I needed to save money. Nobody talked about.

Credit cards credit cards.

Weren't really a thing when I was young.

They really became.

Prevalent along the time when debit cards started coming out because people started using plastic instead of writing checks. You know the old days, it was like you. You'd write the check and you had, you knew you were going to have the.

Money in the bank.

And like a day and 1/2.

That you'd write the check early so that the money and the check hit the count the same time can't do that.

Anymore with debit cards.

And checks and debit cards together.

They're dangerous combination. You can overdraw your accounts so easily that way, but those were the things that I went through.

When I was.

In my 20s and 30s.

But then, you know, education wasn't as expensive as it is.

Now or medical costs were a lot lower than they are now.

Now people entering into like.

Adulting and I have kids that are entering into the adulting world right now and.

You know the.

Biggest thing that I warned them against was don't get into credit card debt, use credit cards, but pay them off every month. Otherwise you're going to get behind and it'll kill you. You just get crushed by the entrance.

Yeah, there is this sense that I think most people feel that the system is not for us and that is really disenfranchising. It's really.

Dark. It feels like if you're not going to win, then just kind of.

I the whole conversation just becomes like this is a drag on my life that I'm always going to carry these chains and I'm always going up, you know, upstream and.

Give up.

I think that is, you know, a lot of the people I talked to, they just have really deep feelings. They have shame. I had shame, embarrassment.

They're laying awake at night alone.

Worrying, just crushing, crushing feelings and it's all people. It's men, it's women. It's everyone in between. You know, I'm an LGBTQ member and advocate because the more types of disenfranchisement you have, the more you feel like the system.

It's not even worth playing the game.

That's failing you.

Oh gosh, yeah. You know, it's like, oh, don't get into credit card, that everything is just panicked because we know all these stories and how it feels.

And you know what? You just don't want that for anyone, right? It's just heartbreaking. And so I just have this mission. I won't be able to fall in love with.

You know.

Their finances I want.

Them to like know that it's OK to look at them, to look at the darkness.

Of the feelings.

There are still moments where I'm like ohh why did I do that when I turned 21, you know? But it's OK and I think this comes into conversation when we're open about it.

Most people feel very isolated around this conversation.

And I just feel like this is the moment for us to bring it forth to each other. I had this idea yesterday that we would throw apart like wealth building parties, and you gather all your friends and then you talk about what's going on.

And it's just like, let's uplight this conversation because.

The heaviness being isolated.

It's not working for us.

And all these beautiful.

People have dreams and it's like a financial peace and it's no one's nobody's fault that we're not.

You know, functioning.

I think part.

Of it is just the way the system is. It's designed to entrap you in debt so that you.

Have to work.

At these really miserable places and almost all of them.

Our pyramid and no matter where you work it.

Even the professions like you know, being.

A doctor or a lawyer.

You know these were.

That's the like.

The pinnacle of what you were going to be is be a doctor and doctors work for corporations. Now they don't make that much money and relative to the amount of debt that they're in from medical school.

It's I wouldn't suggest anybody become a doctor for any reason. It's just it's not worth it because these big conglomerations own them and also own the insurance companies. It's a big circular thing and then they're feeding off the government.

Which is us.

So they're sucking money out of our paychecks in a different way to support this group at the very top.

So it's really.

I don't think it's anybody's fault and I'm an advocate. If you're really buried in debt, file bankruptcy.

Yeah. Do what you gotta need to do. You know, there's a sense that people are waking up to this, right? We're familiar. Now that this system feels rigged.

And within that, I've seen this huge movement. Follow your passion. Follow your vision.

Quit your job. If you follow your bliss.

Like it will happen for you. People will follow. They'll want to do.

And I love that. I love that I'm so excited, and I think there's a second piece to that which might be the action step. I know a lot of people in my life are following.

What their like mission is on this planet or a few missions, and I think the second part that I like to fill in for people is also like that.

Most rooted, like most rooted part, is like, let's get down to the nitty gritty in the numbers so I can help you maximize and optimize the game.

And get excited about it.

You know, there's moments in my budget.

I'm, you know, even if it's it can be stuff, it can be dreams. It can be a business.

Before I started this business.

I wish I had had a savings account that was like for your next big idea.

You don't know what it's going to be, but I wish I'd.

Had savings for it because.

Of course, a new big idea is going to come, and I'm going to want to fund it. And so it's just like, so joyful for me. You know, I did spend a year and a half really buckling down and paying off that debt.

I just went for it. You know, I paid off 30,000 in a.

Year and a half and it was 3 jobs and it wasn't pretty and lots of peanut butter and Jelly sandwiches. But from there I now have the rest.

Of my life.

To pursue what I'm here for and some of those things go unpaid, you know, helping wildlife.

Not, you know, not a business yet. UM, so it's just such a joy to bring people's passions to the next level, which is like, hey, we want to get you there. And how can I? Yeah. How can we also incorporate looking at numbers without fear and.

Feeling like this? You know that the system's rigged. We've got to navigate it, and we can't. Like, I can't let people get bogged down.

Like it's just nice.

And it's fun when you overcome something like that.

Is a big deal.

To pay off that kind of debt.

And to be on the other side of it, it's like and yeah, it was a struggle. But man, you have a story now.

You ate peanut butter and.

Jelly sandwiches. A lot of them. And when you eat them and when you eat.

You know when.

You do go through the tunnel.

In the future, it's.

Like, hey, this is a.

Reminder, I did something really significant with my life.

That's true. I think coming out the other end, you just turn around and see people at the other side of.

Tunnel. And you're like, Oh my gosh, you guys got to come through like, I know it looks dark, but it's bright over here, guys. Yeah. And, you know, for me sharing this with people is such a joy.

And yeah, I still sometimes I'll do a week a weekly challenge. All right, peanut butter and Jelly for, you know, lunch every day for seven days.

Because I want to buy something cool for myself. Right? Like, you know, it's not about what you do with your money. You know, I honestly don't care.

If you want to spend it on, you know A or B, and I'm like, wow, I would never do that. You know who?

Cares it's.

It's an energy. It's a form of energy that we transfer on a daily basis and it really affects our psyche. I think to like compartmentalize it as that dark place or.

Yeah, and it's a lack of recognition that it's an exchange of energy.

Money is just an exchange of energy, life, energy for a lot of people. Because you give up a certain portion of your life to acquire other things that you may perceive you need.

And we don't all have to. There wasn't. Well, let me explain. There was a time when.

You were.

They called it keeping up with the Joneses.

There, there was an appearance that if.

You had a.

Big house and A and a new car that you were doing really well. But the reality of that was these people were like in debt up to their eyeballs.

And they.

Had to do all of these things.

They would, you know, spend a ton of money on a house and a vehicle, and then they're spending all their time having to work in order to pay for these things and they're not able to enjoy this beautiful house and vehicle.

And then vehicles always break down. So then then you're then you're really struggling because you're living paycheck to paycheck. And if you can get to a place where you're not living paycheck to paycheck.

And you know, housing and transportation are two of the biggest costs. I think most people experience in life.

Education and medical are like a close second, but just being able to live within your means.

And understanding.

What it takes for you just to get.

Through the month. And that's just kind of like your base level. This is my base level of where I need to be. And then you've got to cover that somehow. Otherwise you're going to have to figure out, you know, how to lower those two expenses. Maybe you take the bus.

Maybe you find roommates. You know there's there are solutions to these things, but not looking at your numbers doesn't make them change. It just makes you.

Fall further into the hole.

And it there is that sense. It's like I know I, you know, I think I have a lot of clients who feel like my situation is so dire, there's no saving it.

And ohh my gosh, you know, that's that feeling. I think we all.

Have some sense of it.

And I am just here to tell you there are so many great ways to pull to, to pull people, you know.

From that feeling into a better one, because I really believe anyone can.

Winning this this situation, this game. I don't know if I'm the game metaphor, is always my favorite, but I'm feeling it today because there does seem to be a sense of.

Yeah, like combating all these different things like you're saying, like our health insurance systems and all.

These systems but.

Yeah. No, it's pretty powerful. It's, you know, real wealth. I actually had recently had an experience. I thought I was.

Kind of above.

Or had maybe not above the past. The feeling of wanting things that other people had because I was so clear on my vision and what I want.

However, I went to a new friend's house the other day and I had that moment. I had a keeping up with the Jones moment.

And I was so shocked that I was affected by it, but it really got to me and it really just showed how human that experience is.

I was like, wow, they have such a nice dining room table and they have like, this whole backyard and.

I came home really confused. Like do I want? You know, do I need more stuff? Like I felt really.

Good there, but.

You know that's.

The clarity of knowing who you are and what you want.

And it's OK, it's.

OK, to learn to appreciate what other people have rather than wanting it for yourself.

Like you know.

You can always go over there and sit in that yard and enjoy it, and you can go over there and sit and admire her dining room table. You don't have to possess it.

That's true.

It's cheaper that way and.

You get to spend time with this new friend.

Yeah, I love that. I got to wrangle with it. It's it. It. It triggered all sorts of feelings in my in my system around was I making enough? Should I be, you know? And it's not always about being cheap. You know, there's people who like, I want to grow wealth to whatever you want.

You know, help people do that. You know, when I talk about awakening the inner dragon.

I just feel like there's just this core.

You know.

What are you here for?

And how can we match that to your purchases?

I know that when I was in my early 20s and Amazon was new, I bought so many like random items that went to the junkyard.

It it's not value based, right and so.

You know, I can still make a what some people might think a silly purchase, but I know that it aligns with who I am and what I want to do. So that practice is something I do walk through with people.

It's my favorite part. People, you know, I had beliefs from my family. You know, my dad was like, we are not, you know, money doesn't grow on trees.

You know, I had a sense that.

We were very poor.

But I don't think we necessarily were. I think we were fairly middle class and everything was probably OK you know, it's just like all sorts of things that kind of come up for people and how that impacts our whole journey so.

Yeah, I just love it.

And parents are just.

People too, their kids growing up along with you.

I look back.

At my kids now, it was like.

Yeah, I know what I was doing when I.

Was your age?

And you were little babies.

It's like no wonder you have problems.

Yeah, yeah. There's so much compassion around that and so much fun to bring back. You know, you guys can be in different conversation now, too.

Yeah. Yeah, we can. And it's good. And they have a lot of.

Kids. So we have lots.

Of different conversations. They're all in a different place, but it's fun to just get to explore who they are as human being.

Things and not as kids because they're not my kids anymore.

They're just.

These people that I really enjoy being around and I'm exceptionally proud of them. They're all really, really well.

They they've taken on adulting to a new.

Level proud of him for.

I love that.

But it's.

That there's a.

Lot about finances and finances change from period to period, like during COVID. I was thinking about this not that long ago that.

During that time, there was a lot more currency flowing around and so people were spending.

In weird ways, things were closing down, so there wasn't the ability to spend, you know, doing impulse things like you couldn't go out to dinner a whole bunch because there was no place to go out to dinner. So people work cooking at home. And so grocery stores were getting more money.

It just the way spending happened and the interest rates.

Were like incredibly low like.

We refinanced. I'll admit it, we have like an insanely ridiculous mortgage right now.

It's just like.

I am never moving. I'm never moving.

That's great. Let's celebrate. Let's have a party right now.

Yeah, yeah. But if you can take advantage of things like that when they happen because we always go through cycles, you know, sometimes like right now, interest rates are kind of on the ridiculous side. I remember when I bought my first house, it was 10%. It's back up to 6 and 7% right now.

It's just.

And credit cards, credit cards go up and down too, and sometimes you can use credit cards. You can find, you know, 0% interest cards if you if you're carrying a big debt transferred to that work on paying it down as much as you can.

And then move it to a different.

That's true, there's there are tons of strategies and you know I.

I actually I a friend from work sat me down and showed me a budget app and I didn't even know what a.

Budget really was.

Except it kind of looked like a video game to me, and I loved it. And so that was my introduction to some of that. And now I like the strategy is the hardest part. So I essentially had a financial coach.

Walk me through.

All of these strategies how? How do you gamify and make this fun? How?

How do you get out and be strategic? And there is so much information out there. That's why I feel confident about my role. I love to be that partner and that adventure buddy like hey.

Let's get you from, like, aid to financial freedom, and it's going to take a.

Little bit of.

Right, like organization and anyone can do that alone. I really just want people to do it together and it doesn't have to be me, but like, grab a friend because like you're saying there's all these like.

Now, because the next level, like if we're getting out of debt, we're done with that. Now we both billed now credit cards become a way to travel.

And hacking is so much.

Fun. Like, what's the cooler word than that?

It is really fun and it's like.

And you start making all your purchases on your Amazon card because you get all these points and you can use that to buy some. Yeah.

Like more? Yeah. Go for it. Yeah. I've been thinking about that too. They have a 5%. So it's interesting. And. And, you know, I mean, people go real deep on some things. There's.

That you're gonna buy anyway.

You know, there's just all sorts of really fun ways to manage it, and it feels really heavy when you're in the.

The debt side of things, but once you come out of that, there's all these amazing things. You know, one was is Geo arbitrage which is.

You know, having a higher income and getting to live in a lower income area and a lot of you know a lot of people got to do that during COVID when they went remote.

And or, you know, minimalism is one. Yeah. Minimalism and the small home thing, that whole movement.

We do.

It requires you to.

Have minimal.

Items, I mean you can only have I know some people that had like a.

100 items if they.

Bought something new? Something else. Had to go.

And so you really think about your purchases, you know, and it's kind of like the bigger the home that.

You live in the.

More crap you acquire.

And you recognize it when you move.

Ohh real it's so.

Real and it. And with that comes income.

Creep. The more you make, the more you.

Friend and I know people who make 6 figures and are paycheck to paycheck. Yeah, it's not how much you make, it's how you value.

Your time and money. And yeah, real wealthy people. They don't buy Lamborghinis. They value their time above all else.

So yeah, just getting that shift into our minds, it's helped. I have to remind myself every day there are definitely people that I know that they want to live.

Lavish they do.

Not want minimalism? That's their worst nightmare. Great.

Let's get that for you.

I know that I've recently moved from like tent camping to like wanting something a little nicer, you know, so you just have to shift, you know, your vision and ideals and that's great and.

We built a camper.

For our truck, we.

Very cool.

Have a flatbed truck and we built a wooden camper for it. It's beautiful.

Wait, how does it work? Does.

It sit on top.

Sits on the flatbed and has an overhang.

What a beautiful dream.

It was we, my husband and I built it mostly I built.

It but he helped.

We didn't know how to use woodworking tools, so we had.

To a buy them and B figure out how they worked and there was this guy on YouTube. His name is end.

Him and he was building wooden campers and my husband's like, you know.

Campers for your truck are just so expensive. Let's build 1, and when he says let's do something that really means here. Honey, there's a project for you. Go do.

It and I did, and I sent him a picture of it or a video of it, and tagged him. And it was pretty cool.

It's great. We love it.

It turned out really good.

That's amazing.

I I'm in love with that idea.

I think there's a sense.

You know, I mean, I'm a millennial.

I think there's this idea of like.

Retirement in the future, like when I retire, we'll do all these things and I just want we should do them now.

You know, like we should.

Yes, she should.

Do them now.

And you have energy.

Yes. Yeah. So I love that.

You guys did that? I think that's amazing and.

It does set out the principles of.

I don't know. Just like when you have a vision and it brings you joy, that's what you should follow.

And I and I love that I.

Total new strategy. Yeah, another strategy. You know, there's just.

So many fun.

Optimization maximization that I love. That's lovely. That's lovely.

And we have the best.

Time we go out in it and.

We live in a place where you can go camping in like 30 minutes from your house. You're up in the mountains and it's beautiful and.

So you don't have to like go forever and.

So you can.

Go overnight, yeah.

Alright, I'm going to look this up.

I'll send you a picture.

Of it later.

So I know that you have something that you offer people when they visit your website to kind of help them get started and help them get to know you.

Talk about that a little bit.

I do have a free guide. It's a checklist.

The idea here is.

Sometimes we need to start from the beginning.

Which is our beliefs and our vision.

You know, if we're going to get into looking at numbers.

And I think that kind of stuff is a bit exciting, but I know that people, most people think budgeting is their worst nightmare and the conversation nobody wants to have.

UM, so where I want to start is getting our vision really clear. Like, hey, here we are. And what do I want? What do I want?

Honestly, like I have someone in my family. What she wants is, like really nice handbags and all sorts of things, and that's awesome. So I want to support that.

And if that's the vision that's so that's so beautiful. Like, let's do that. I have other people in my life who they're huge hikers, you know, complete opposite in that sense. They want to focus on that. Other people have businesses and some people like me.

Me, I my interest. They're so varied. I don't know if I'll ever arrive at my purpose. And so how do we kind of get that? So my, my.

My offering is to help people get a little clarity on their vision and then we want to move to looking at the numbers, getting into the nitty gritty and looking at it with a fresh face.

I know that the shame, guilt and embarrassment I felt was so overwhelming it was immobilizing.

And so you'll see from my website and my offerings like we want to bring love and joy and we want to bring a heart.

Centered approach to this.

Because I think a lot of us just feel so alone in those feelings.

And we're so here for it, so.

I hope that that kind of gives you know what offer is.

A little bit of a start to how you can begin the process of embracing.

Your financial life and letting it really lead the way for your and pave the way for what you want and your dreams. So it's an it's an exciting it's an exciting website and offering.

Are you doing this one-on-one coaching or is it a group coaching? Or are you hoping to get to?

Group coaching or?

I'm open to group.

Coaching, I am definitely doing one-on-one that's like me and you partnering.

Or not you. Maybe, but me and my client really working together and I like to think it is a financial adventure. So we're adventure buddies. We're going to get through the adventure through the forest. That's why there's magical beasts everywhere. Because in my world.

You know you have to.

If we're not having fun, what are we doing?

Right.

And my core values are love. You know, laughter, that kind of thing. So if that matches what people are looking for, right, the opposite is I think a lot of people think of, like a white man and a button down T-shirt with a collar at their Gray desk.

Being like, let's look at your finances and that's actually, I don't want to make fun.

Of that person.

But it's it is a vibe, right? And for me, it's joy. Laughter. We're going to do it from a place of love. We're going to do it together and I want to empower people to be able to take it so they're not.

You know, relying on me.

So we want to demystify those finances and then make it super fun because.

Yeah, obviously, but.

It can be. It can be just like this huge game.

It's just so fun to me and I just want to share that with people like you said earlier, it's like you get out the other side and you have this huge thing to share with people and yeah.

Yeah, and it makes the world.

A better place.

So they can get a hold of you on your website, which is coaching with Wave.

Dot com, right?

That's correct. Yeah. Coaching with wave dotcom. I'm. I'm actually just starting a newsletter and it's going to be a positive news. So if you open my newsletter, you're just going to see positive news articles, and it may or may not be related to finance, but it is time to ditch the fear and time to embrace the.

Oh, I'm still with your sister.

Yeah, I am. I'm a big, you know, I am just a bigger person is reading the news and getting wrapped up in it, but this is going to be something that's really important to me that we get to see good news. There's so much goodness out there and let's share it. So if you if anyone does decide to join my newsletter, it will.

Most it will not be so much as.

And finances and you know it's going to.

Be pretty heavy on good news.

Right we need.

More of that in.

The world, like the right thing to do, you know. You know that sense like.

I want people to.

Know that I'm here for them.

And I'm also that's a natural process.

So going to my website, you can e-mail me, you can contact me. I am so here.

For it even.

If you just have a simple question, I have more than happy to answer it.

If it's something I can do without coaching, we'll work on that. I do have three different offers, so I do have a five month program.

That's just full adventure style like let's do this. I have been waiting and let's get my whole life started. Let's start. I do have a three month version, which is a miniature version. I can definitely do that.

All of these are individualized, personalized plans.

And then I have a one time.

Kind of. Let's get at this. So most people, every client that I've had.

Is thriving. It's so cool and you know, and it's just a process for me to be a part.

Of it is so beautiful.

So what's the one thing you want to leave?

The audience with today.

Oh my gosh, please. Like reach out to a friend or family member and just let them know if you're struggling at all financially and just talk about it. You know, this isn't going to be a radical act.

Of self love.

To do this to look at your finances in a new way, and it needs, it's a necessary act of community care.

It is time to bring this into like out of the personal. This is not personal finance. This is now like, let's do this together.

Like, please don't. Please don't suffer alone. Like we're we all can do this together and there is no amount of shame or guilt.

That's worse. Worse.

Not reaching out.

And really on a.

On a global responsibility level, if everyone could figure out how to make their finances work for them, there's going to be more abundance everywhere. Because when people who are.

In this this.

Fear and lack mindset.

You tend to hang on to.

What little you?

Have rather than the abundance of.

Hey, I.

And just let this go and I know more is.

Coming back around to help me.

It keeps the abundance flowing, the energy flowing instead of damming it up and in that way the whole world really does benefit because the people that lack, you know, because they're the far end of the stream, they're suddenly there's an abundance that can happen for them, and then they have.

The resources that they can start producing and.

Then that it just keeps.

It the energy flowing, so it really does, it really is a big deal. Pay attention to your finances. Talk to 1.

Yeah. No, that's a great point. It's a form of waging peace on Earth.

I really believe.

That. Yeah, that's a lovely way to put it.

To be in flow.

Thank. Thank you so much, Wade, for joining me today. This is an amazing conversation.

Oh my gosh.

Thank you so much. I'm so excited to talk to you. It's so much fun and thank you.