One Big Idea, Alignment, and the Right Audience – Be A Lighthouse

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Stacey Hall Podcast.m4a

Transcript

Hi and welcome to the You World Order Showcase podcast. Today we have with us a special guest, Stacey Hall. Stacey is the founder of success with Stacey Hall has taken five books to the number one best seller status in multiple countries. She's known for her myth busting social media marketing training program. Go for yes.

Which has helped thousands of people attract more sales, satisfaction and success. She is an acclaimed speaker who has gained recognition for her Ted X talk. Her mission is to help salespeople attract and connect their to their ideal audience, solve their ideal audiences, problems, leave a legacy that lives on.

Long after they are gone, welcome to the show, Stacy. It is really my honor to have you here.

I've been looking forward to this for a very long time. I love your show and I'm excited to be in your studio.

I just for full transparency, I met Stacy because I went through a course that she put together. It's how to get selected as a Ted X presenter in three easy steps and it was it was.

Really.

It wasn't a really long in-depth course, but man, so many great Nuggets in there about how to how to put a presentation together. I think the biggest single thing that I got out of the whole the whole course was one big idea. And that's just like.

Life changing and that's that's what it was designed to do. So if you've got it, yay. No, I don't believe in dragging things out. I believe in getting to the point and now that's exactly what that course is all about, is in when you're preparing for a tent or a TEDx talk.

It is a very short amount of time and in that amount of time we must be able to present an idea.

That the vast majority of people believe is worth hearing and glad that you shared it. So that means taking a lot of the information and synthesize and synthesize and God raises it. Synthesize all the way down.

To the nugget and when we were at the Nugget, that's truth. And usually truth opens up the mind and I'm going to say thank you if you really gave yourself to the course, you got your big idea. I love.

What?

I did get my big idea and I know that you did a Ted X talk and I did listen to your Ted X talk. Actually a couple of times because I really loved the whole your whole big idea about not shooting on yourself. And you know it's it's.

It's memorable. It's one of those things that you know.

I I find myself when I'm saying I should do something. Oh, no, Stacey says. I don't have to brush that off your shoulder. Exactly. And today, most people, probably hearing them go. Well, that's not a new idea. Well, no, not today. It isn't.

Because that 10X talk has gone all around the world, and I've noticed so many. There's tons of blog articles now.

There's, I'm sure there's probably a book or two some out there where it's all about that. There's tons of posts.

But when I gave that presentation.

Nobody was talking about that, and that was an idea we're sharing because it's culturally embedded in our minds.

Not so much in our brains, but in our minds that we automatically say that.

And if you watch any kind of media, you're going to hear that word come up all the time. And in my opinion, it is the most self debilitating word that has ever been created.

I have to agree with you. It just stops you from it stops you from allowing your creativity to flow because suddenly you're locked in this channel and you have to go in that direction. You don't have any other options. It closes off your other options that you might. You just might come up with.

Might be a really good idea. It might be a better idea than the should thing that.

You're being locked into.

And and because we resist as adults, the minute we don't have to listen to someone else telling us what we should do when we do it to ourselves and we don't want to do it.

It freezes us and it creates that procrastination. Perfectionism. Like, why am I not going? I know I should. Why am I not right? Well, maybe it's because I'm a contrasting nator. No. Maybe it's because I'm a perfectionist. Ohh no, it's because.

We said we should, so I always say throw the shouts out and look at. And by the way, there's cousins to should, which is have to.

Right.

So the.

The way we look at it is, do I choose to do it and the minute I say I do choose to do, it gives us back our power.

And we're no longer victim to it. And then if we don't choose to do it, then say that no, I do not choose to do this.

I will not do this in business if it's something that is required for a business to grow.

I say then choose to give it to someone else to do.

And if you say to yourself you don't have the money to give it to someone else, then the choice becomes can you choose to do it for a while?

You're not.

If you really want that business to grow, or can you choose to do something else rather than growing your business, right? So it always comes back to the minute we hear the **** in the head.

Do I choose to do it? Do I choose not to do it? And then that gets us continuously moving forward?

I love that it. It reminds me of.

Of moving towards something rather than away from something.

I I chose to quit.

Consuming alcohol.

But I framed it to myself as I'm embracing sobriety, and there are so many other options as.

In that in that camp for me, and it's not A and not everybody has to do this sort of thing. It was just it's an example of moving towards something rather than I should quit drinking cause I've should have to quit drinking like lots of times in my life. But when I just decided ohh, I think I'm just going to embrace sobriety.

For a while.

The should wasn't part of the conversation.

No.

Lives in a whole nother world. Exactly. That's what you just demonstrated. Some people you chose to embrace sobriety. It produces many other activities.

Right.

Than the other I I'm I. I've always been sober. I'll say that I realized that my lots of congestion I had had for years.

My husband kept saying to me.

You.

You should go on a gluten free diet. You should go on and and there was this. I didn't realize what I was resisting was the actual should part of it. But one day I sat down and I started thinking about, OK, what would that look like to go on a gluten free diet? And once I had the information I said, OK, I'm going to choose.

To go on and I choose.

Every day for me, this is my one one day at a time, and I've been doing it for 19 years. One day at a time, because I like the way I feel when I stick to a gluten free diet.

Yeah.

And I would never have like if I had said OK, yeah, you're right. I should. And it would never have.

Happened.

Or you try it for a couple of days and then you're like, yeah, no, I shouldn't.

Because the other side of that is no, I shouldn't.

Yeah, this isn't. This isn't working for me. I'm like constantly thinking about it all the time because it's like.

You're denying yourself and the minute you start denying yourself something, that's all your brain is going to.

Think about is how can I get it?

Let it happen, yes, absolutely and 100% agree with you.

But when you.

When you make a choice, it's like.

You can choose the other options because there's lots of other options out there and it it'll allows you when you start making choices, it also opens up the.

The opportunity for new choices to be made along that path, that the choice that you made opened up for you like you chose to go gluten free. So now you can look at the choices of what you can pick that are all in that camp versus that I can have.

Anything I want, camp. And so you're like, is it gluten free, is it not gluten free? You know, it's like it's it's so much more chaos out there when you have all of these.

These options, rather than picking.

Picking to narrow it down to being more focused, it goes back to your one big idea.

That's there it is. Shoes. That's all there is. Just choice. Just I didn't say that right. And just make a choice is what I meant to say. So. Yes, that's the idea.

Yeah. And and from that one choice, other choices open up and it it expands and it suddenly becomes like all-encompassing and it it's kind of fun really. Ohh, it really is, I mean you said it perfectly. I'm OK. So another way we're going to stay on this this topic.

I had gotten to the point where I was not expecting to get married.

Two-story I was 33.

And I had. I had had, you know, a fabulous corporate job. Life traveled everywhere on their dime, ate it all the best places went to all the best things.

And and then.

You know, all my friends were getting married and having kids, and I was not. And so I had a pity party for a little bit of time.

And it's actually how I came to understand the should versus the choice. I didn't do the 10X talk till years later, but it was in this experience where I said to myself.

You're pitting yourself for all the things you cannot do because you're not in a relationship.

What if you took the other side of it, just like you just said?

What can I do?

Because I'm not in a relationship, I don't have to consider someone else in the equation, and I made a list of all the things I could choose to do as a single woman, and one of them was.

Travel on my own like, not just with the company, but why not take my money and go traveling while I'm free and have active and, you know, can have fun and all of that.

That's exactly what I did.

I met my husband while I was traveling.

Ah.

Not I didn't do it.

To meet a husband, I had accepted that I might not ever have that kind of relationship. So what am I going to create my life to be?

The best single life I could have.

And I was really enjoying it. I gave it up. It was a hard one. The choice.

Because it wasn't, it should. It wasn't. Ohh yeah. Now I should get married. It was. No. Do I choose to get married because I am having so much fun being single.

Oh.

And and and that choice is probably a really good choice because.

You had to give up a.

Lot in order to.

Embrace a different.

Path in your life, which you know it opens up other things that are really amazing too, but.

Yes.

But you have to make a decision. It's not like you're just like, automatically. OK, now I'm going to get married, and now I'm gonna have kids, and now I'm going to be a grandma and.

Now I'm going to sit on the couch and die.

Because you know, that's the path that if you don't make decisions, most people go down.

I would say many people do still, but there was a time when that was probably true of most folks. Now I'm I'm seeing more and more people making choices because the world, you know, and when the world was stagnant pretty much this is the way it was in the world.

Friends. And now it's like now. What, like? Well, OK, I guess.

You know, it's we either accept it and go OK with the freedom. What am I going to do with the freedom? Or I can sit down?

And cry for the past.

Yeah, I I I choose the latter. And you know the.

Ah.

My people are like they're out there doing stuff. It doesn't matter how old you are. It's like.

The world began today. Let's seize it. I love that. Absolutely yes.

I have a client who's in her 80s and she she is just like I got to get this done. I got to get this done today because I don't know if I've got tomorrow and and I have a message and I just got to get out there and.

It's just like, so great.

Well, that was me at the age of 60. I'm 66, by the way, and.

There was a date, so all my business up to that point was created.

Person to person, belly to belly in person. Right. I'm there. First off, zoom was nowhere near as easy.

And reliable as it is now, there were other services, but they were clunky.

Right.

Social media was around six years ago and coming into its.

Coming into being comfortable for most people right prior to that it was and and I was on it when it was uncomfortable for people, but it was still for me easier for a period of time to just keep doing the in person networking.

Then then let's meet for coffee chats and person and.

And one day.

As I was pulling my briefcase full of my, you know, my business cards and my brochures and the all the stuff that used to, I used to take with me, my body went. You're not doing this anymore.

Not that I felt old.

I'm just tired of lugging now. This is like we're not lugging anymore. It's enough. We're not giving enough breakfast. We're going to start walking the dogs in the morning, right? With your husband. Well, this is what we're going to choose to do, Stacy.

Which meant.

Embracing, choosing to embrace social media for business like I never had before and getting training on how to do that because I did. I thought I knew. I wound up in Facebook jail six times in five months. Story.

And I if I believe that if I had done it again, they probably would have kicked me off at that point. I mean, that's when Facebook was a little more generous with things.

But I wasn't going to give him another chance, so I went and got training right at the age of 60, and now I've won awards for social media marketing. I'm able to teach my clients how to do both in person and social media marketing and selling. The best thing that ever happened to me.

Was saying not. I'm getting old and I choose to do something to keep going so I don't get old.

And you said something else there.

I'm 64 so I can I we're kind of in the same like tier and in terms of.

It's OK to ask for help. It's OK to hire people to teach you how to do things and.

It doesn't matter if they're a lot younger than you. I can't tell you how many times I've gone to my kids and said, hey, I don't.

Get this and they're like, oh, just do this. It's like, well, OK, but hiring help to show you how to take the next step or how to do the things that you're trying to accomplish. You know, everybody's here for a reason. We all have something great to contribute.

You know, get help figuring out how to make what your thing is really shine.

Right.

Yeah, I 100% and I will say that well, I didn't have children. My husband has children. They're not in the world for the most part of social media. So I'm quite envious of those of you who have built in help in your children because, yeah, they know how to do all of it right and more so.

Congratulations.

I.

I ended up having.

Kids over a a 21 year period. So I have like a 20 year old and I have a 40 year old and three kids in between but their their take on things is like so different the 40 year olds versus the 20 year olds.

Really, it's like it's interesting.

I would I I didn't feel like there was that much change in that 20 year period, but I see what I don't know.

It's pretty it's pretty dramatic. I mean the the different.

From from this vantage point, the difference in their development is like and, and the way that they interact on social media or with in person is. It's really different and it's it's to me, from a sociological point of view, it's it's interesting to see, yeah.

Yep.

But it is I. I'm fascinated by things like that too.

Not not that anything is.

Good or bad, it's just the way that it.

Is just an experience.

It's just an experience. Did you get your start in network marketing or was it?

How did you get into all of this?

No, I love that work marketing, but new and I say that because I was one of those who was like because I've been around long enough to remember when.

Am I?

It had earned the reputation it had had right, and I am so grateful that the industry itself grew up.

But that also this is one of those things when the world changed.

The younger generations from me.

Said we're not going in the traditional path, so how can I get a business going when I have no money right there? It was network Mikey and they have made it something that.

Is accessible to all.

And I am so thrilled and I am so proud. In fact, I'm a columnist for the Network Marketing magazine, which publishes every month. So plug for that. I I am. I'm very grateful. No, I I resisted it for a very long time. My, my world. I started in the corporate world.

Doing marketing primarily for ad agency, I was in that agency for five years in Chicago. I was an accounting executive. I went from there to manage marketing for Budget Rent-a-car Corporation for the United States and Canada.

And also enjoy teaching our franchisees how to do their own marketing locally and by doing that, I came to the attention of Federal Express, now FedEx back then Federal Express.

And I did that for the company in a 17 state region. So actually taking what they were doing corporate wide and bringing it into the very local markets and and working with the sales and the operations people there. So I I had a lot of grounding.

In true sales.

Which I always put after marketing, so it's not sales and marketing, it's marketing and sales. And then?

They had the opportunity to teach.

Classes for the small Business Development Center and.

I was appalled.

At what they were trying to teach insurance agents and Realtors and spa owners and network marketers.

Like you only need us if you need to go get money for a business plan. Why are we teaching? They you're you're teaching them how to get money. If they need money. OK, but what about all the other stuff? What you're teaching is going to make them bankrupt. If they do this.

And I was complaining about this. I have always had a coach or mentor and I was complaining to my coach at the time.

She said OK, Stacy, what would you do instead? And I said blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

And she said, well, then why don't you? Why don't you become a consultant to entrepreneurs of all different types? Cause she said what you just said, every one of my clients could use you. So she helped me craft a six month exit plan from.

My job and more than 25 years ago, that's what I did. I went out on my own and I've never looked back, and I'm grateful that.

I knew I knew right. You know, I had a a guidance. This is what I was supposed to be doing. This is my passion. Five books later. Ted X talk later here. I am still doing it. Loving it and I absolutely adore my clients.

That is awesome. What a great story and.

Thank you.

What a great way to.

To get into.

Doing what you're really meant to do because it.

I I think when we find find the thing that lights us up.

Then it's not really work, it's just it's just sharing the message.

Did you know about this?

And and doing it in a way that.

That the people that are looking for you, I think you have somewhere on your website about turning people from being spotlights into lighthouses searchlights.

Lights into lighthouses. Yeah, that's the lighthouses here. Most people who are doing marketing and sales.

Are exhausted. They're burnt out. They're bent out of shape.

Because they're looking for people, because they and it's not their fault. It's not their fault, it's the training they've been given. It's the cultural approach to what selling means. And you had said earlier, it's just when we were chatting, it's just making an offer, yes.

But making a suggestion or an offer to who or whom, that's.

The question.

Some author and an audience.

Yeah, and. And the bridge is alignment.

And that's what's selling from your comfort zone is a process of getting into alignment with yourself.

With what you're selling with that ideal audience and with what you're saying to that audience, and when you have that alignment, you are truly standing tall. You know what you stand on, you know what you stand for and your messaging is like a brilliant light because it's.

Put where the right people are going to see it.

And then they come to you and they say, hey, I want more of those tips.

And people want more of those tips are the people we make offers and suggestions to.

I love that I I in my mind, I I have this picture of McDonald's and you know the the whole if I offered you a McDonald's franchise, would you say yes and it?

Uh.

But you really the answer should be not necessarily. Where is it located? Because where it's located the audience that you're speaking to or now are you on the alignment with them like you were saying is is the most important factor.

It's.

Yes. Well, if you can afford to buy a McDonald's franchise, I would say the yes you choose which one, which location would be most in alignment with you coming back to you asked me about network marketers.

Hmm.

It doesn't require very much money to start a business in some. In some companies it doesn't require anything. You get a full link for free and just go sell.

But who are you selling to?

And what are you selling because?

The marketing is the presentation of the products, that's true.

But nobody needs us to show them the pretty products they can Google that you name the name of the company, they'll go Google it, they'll go look for all the negative stuff. You know, they'll look for customer reviews, but they'll get hooked on the negativity comments.

Which is why.

We don't want to be showing pretty products. We want to be talking about.

Solutions to problems.

And we will only be authentic.

When we're talking about the solutions these products made to our own problems.

And the folks who are doing that?

Are succeeding in network marketing.

That there is a statistic.

That about eighty? Well, only 3%. This is true only 3% of all network marketers worldwide make more than $200 a year.

Not a month.

A year?

It's not because of a shortage of audience. It's because of a shortage of audience who doesn't? Who wants to see the pretty product?

And the only reason they want to see what you're talking about is so they can go figure out if they know somebody else who's selling it that they trust more, right?

So that's what they'll do. They'll go. Let me go find an influencer who's selling this. Who's got? You know, more knowledge about this? Anyways, I could go. You could say I can go on a long time for this.

Sorry.

So being in alignment with ourselves, being in alignment with what we're selling.

Be in alignment.

With the audience be in alignment with our content, then what happens is we build confidence in ourselves.

And when we're confident that we're consistent in our marketing efforts.

And that's the only reason that some people are more trusted than others is they're consistent. They show up every day. They respond to comments.

They say thank you to people versus.

And this isn't just true in network marketing. This is true in every entrepreneurial business.

It happens to me on LinkedIn all day long. I get a connection request, I write the person back and they say thanks for your connection request. What was it about my profile you liked?

They either get a canned pitch right the copy and paste then does not answer my question, just puts their stuff in front of me, or I get nothing.

Why did you bother to send me the connection request in the first place?

If you're not going to check back to see if I responded to you.

But I'm going on a little bit. These are my pet peeves and I want the audience to understand there's so much that goes into becoming trustworthy.

Resource.

Which is really what a salesperson is meant to be a trustworthy resource.

And if you're going to get in DMS with people.

Have a human to human conversation. It's not and ask about them first. Ask about them.

And be curious and you know, not just like one question. Find out about them, find out what their problems are before you even know if you can solve any of their problems because you know you can't solve everybody's problems. Hard thing to to swallow sometimes.

This.

Especially if you think you can. Really, you're going to be good at solving a couple of problems.

We're all good at a couple of things really good at a couple of things, the rest of.

It you know.

Not so much. No, like and and just to put a fine point on it, just because I can read about something and feel like I've got book learning smarts that does not translate.

Into selling the only problems we can solve are the ones we've had first hand experience solving. Either it was a problem our child had, or a family member had, or we had it. That's it. That's what you were saying. Here is, if you haven't had first hand experience.

We don't care.

What science says we don't care about the websites where you found information. We only care what did it do for you personally. Now, now I can.

Trust you.

OK, so this circle is all the way back to where we started with you helping people do Ted X talks presentations and it's all about the story. People only care about stories. People only remember stories. They're not going to remember your website. They're not going to remember your whatevers.

Out there, the statistics you need statistics for one side of your brain or the other, but very minimal because you're not going to remember them, but you what you are going to remember is the stories that were told and and people will hang.

Right.

On to that.

It's.

It's where the magic happens. Yeah, and having the one big idea and constantly be drawing everything back to your one big idea.

Yeah, that's exactly it. So back where we are.

I.

I know that some people think that speaking is the biggest fear that they have even before they get to the one big idea. So my gift to your listeners is that how to get over the fear of public speaking and if they want more information about Ted or Ted.

And they are two different things. They are connected by Ted. Ted.

A Ted talk.

Would be given by somebody who's already got a huge audience, or is that a head of a large organization Research Institute? That's what Ted got created to bring those voices out to the public out of the boardrooms and out to the public.

10X is still sponsored by Tenet. It gives regional voices, local and regional voices a chance to be heard and seen, and if you go to theted.com website, you'll see the distinction between the two. And so I'm.

I'm. I'm a Ted X presenter. I'm preparing a presentation for Ted keeping, you know, the vision alive for that at at the very least, I will do more 10X talks based on selling from your comfort zone and why.

No matter whether you're selling or not, we don't ever want to get out of our comfort zone.

Yeah.

It's nice there and you're more helpful there because you can speak with authority when you're comfortable, when you're shaking in your boots.

You're not going to come across as.

As an authoritative figure, right? Just don't trust you. So the the gift that you're offering is how to speak or how to get past the fear of public speaking. And it's an ebook, and we will have the link for that in the show notes for people to to take you up on that.

My voice.

Stacy, it has been so fascinating chatting with you.

Today, thank you.

Really. Enjoy this. So do you want to share, though? One thing you hope the audience will take away from.

This conversation, we've coming so much around.

Yes. And now that, well I we've we've covered so many.

Topics to me alignment, so I'm going to tie everything together. The one big idea.

OK.

The concept of alignment.

And the concept of choice.

That's the big idea. Is always choose what is in alignment with you to do, whether it's have chicken or fish for dinner.

Or looking at a career choice.

Looking at a romantic partner choice always choose and release the should and when you choose, you'll know what you're in alignment with.

I love that. Thanks for joining me today.

My pleasure. Thank you for the invitation.