Fausta Luchini – Find Your Center So That You Can Fill From a Full Cup; Recenter Your Soul

Transcript

You know, I should be able to do that.

Welcome to this show Fausta

It's so nice to have you here.

And this is the You World Order Showcase podcast.

So that's to tell us what you're all about.

Well, first, I'm delighted to be here.

Thank you so much for having me and for offering this to people.

This is wonderful. I am a trauma sensitive holistic coach and offer a variety of services work in a variety of areas.

With people to help them live the life they want to live.

That's awesome.

I know on your website you talk about being a whole person, certified coach.

Does that look like?

So that's the coaching program I completed, OK, really I should start with my background.

If we go into this right?

Perfect.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So I was a licensed psychotherapist for about 20 years and then I decided I wanted.

To be a coach.

Instead, and so I went to coach training school, because how else would I know if I was really coaching or not?

Right, and the training school I went to offered a certification called.

Whole person certified coach.

So that's what I got.

OK.

OK.

Is it like life coaching or?

It is.

Yes, it's a very holistic approach to life coaching.

I find it interesting with the whole life coaching.

Title because often it's like.

You're not really sure what aspect of life coaching people are working on.

I

All right.

Do have a life coach certification but.

Mostly I use it to help people in.

Business because that's where my passion is so.

Right, right.

How, where, where, where does your passion lie?

And what little corner of the.

The Life coaching world do you do you occupy?

So really, offer resilience and emotional well-being.

Coaching is probably the best label for it because I come from a background of having worked with trauma survivors.

I'm really clear that what I offer is trauma sensitive coaching, which doesn't mean people have to talk about trauma. It just means that I understand trauma, how it affects us.

How it shows up differently for different people and different types of trauma that impact?

Right.

And so that's kind of a foundation.

For the work I do.

That's very specialized.

Yeah, it really is.

And yet you can use that with anybody, because I think the trauma has where we once thought of it as sort of something that happened to people that were in a war or maybe people that were abused were beginning to see that events create collective trauma.

And so the pandemic, for example.

Was something that affected us all in tremendous ways, that we're still coming to terms with and will be for a long time.

And so it helps to have an understanding of how that works.

That's that is trauma in itself and everybody experiences.

Trauma on some.

Level or another, most people don't really know.

How to deal with it?

Do you have suggestions for with?

I mean, I think the most important thing to know is that the ways that we react to trauma are super normal, even when they don't seem like they are, they really make sense.

And so it's not that there's something wrong with you, it's that you're trying really hard to process the.

Things that have happened to you.

Where it becomes a problem is when people try to avoid.

Dealing with that and it's actually the numbing yourself and kind of running away from it, it becomes the real problem.

And so the most important thing we can do is reconnect with ourselves and really get in touch with who we are with our bodies, with our minds and our spirits.

So perfect, so perfect.

It's hard often for people that are really busy to slow down enough.

Do you find that the people that you work with you're having to like, grab them by the heel and sit?

Them down and say.

Here, let's take 10 minutes.

So the people that I work with typically are beginning to feel overwhelmed with the stress and the speed of their own lives.

Sometimes they really just need somebody to say.

Hey, why don't you come sit over here with me for a while?

Let's just talk about what's going on.

And they're.

Like ah ah.

And you can take a breath and pause with that.

I'm not actually very good at dragging people by the heels, just for the record, that is not my strong suit.

Yeah, well.

I think if you have.

Right, right approach.

You probably don't need to.

People are always looking for an excuse to sit down and and spend 5 minutes breathing instead of off to the next thing that they have to get done because everything is expected of them.

Right.

So who's your ideal client?

My ideal client is somebody who is experiencing high stress.

Most often somebody who finds themselves taking care of other people and has trouble putting themselves first.

Who is used to giving and doesn't ask for a whole lot in return?

And has become sort of out of balance in their life because of that.

And how would that look?

To the average person, if somebody's listening to this show and they're like, maybe that's me, maybe that's not me. How would I know?

Right.

So for some people it is it is because of a job they have.

And for those people, and even for others, you find yourself waking up in the middle of the night, worried about other people's problems, not your own problems, but what's going on with somebody else? And how are you going to help them? What are you going to do?

You find yourself noticing that you feel pulled in different directions and that you can't quite figure out.

What you're supposed to be doing right now?

You feel a sense of high stress and anxiety.

You're uncomfortable in your own body.

Maybe you're just noticing that you're.

You feel tight.

You feel tense.

You can't relax.

Those kinds of things.

So how does working with you look?

So I.

The main rule I follow for working with me is that the focus is very much on who you are.

It is not about figuring out what's wrong with you.

It's not about figuring out what ideal expectations from the outside world you should.

Live up to.

It is really about being able to relax into a sense of who you.

Are and often we begin with some values work.

And just clarifying who, what's important to you, where do you stand?

And then, because I have a plethora of tools that I can use right, I have cognitive behavioral skills.

I do mindful self compassion and other techniques.

We begin to look at some of that.

Is it the stories you're telling yourself that are getting in your way?

Are you thinking?

Well, but I have to be responsible for this.

And if you are.

Is that really a fact, or is that just the story you're used to telling yourself?

And so we might start there.

We might start by recognizing that you procrastinate a lot.

That brings people in all the time.

I just I can't get anything done well, often.

That's because your energy isn't focused where you really want it to be.

Once you're able to take that step back and pause right to pause, essential.

Reconnect with your own wisdom.

Then you can begin to sort through the other things and begin to look at.

What do I really want to be doing?

That's not to say there aren't things you might need to do.

That you don't want to do, but even then you need to do them, because something that's important to you.

Something that moves you forward.

And so just that deep internal exploration shows us what directions you need to move in to be able to move forward in whatever way you want in your life.

Yeah, profound.

In, in my experience, just the slowing down and taking stock of your values is super helpful and you you're spot on when it comes to like all the things that we all want to do, we're feel that we have to do like.

To go do this because.

This person is really depending on me.

Ohh really is that?

Person really depending on you or did you just volunteer for something else?

That makes you feel a.

Certain way, not necessarily that they would appreciate it or even want it.

Yeah, exactly.

I think there are a lot of things in life like that that we just do because we feel like we should be doing them rather than.

You know, really evaluating the benefit of doing them to anybody involved really, right.

Right.

It's looking at the facts of the matter.

Is what I'm telling myself accurate?

Yeah, it's interesting how we've how we've evolved as a society and how now more than ever, people are coming more to terms with the idea that we can slow down.

We can evaluate the things that we're doing.

I think as a society we went through a period of time where we were.

And I equated back to like the 70s.

It's to me.

Everything was brown.

That's how I remember the 70s.

It was khaki brown.

Things were boxes, buildings were created.

They were boxes.

They were.

Ugly and institutional, institutional everything, institutional furniture.

And we had the green and orange avocado green and this burnt orange that just designed to set you on edge.

Everything about the 70s was designed to put you on edge.

It was like they tried to take the classics lines of the six or the 50s and six.

These and just like make it as garish as possible without any aesthetic.

Beauty to it.

And as the years have gone.

And decades have gone by.

We.

To be more in a.

In a a I'm not gonna say ethereal, but it's.

It's more of a.

The energy is different, it's more vibrant.

But it's more.

Thoughtful and artistic and subtle ways people are presenting themselves, and it shows up as bodyguard.

It shows up in all kinds of different ways, especially with the young people.

Where they're just.

Like saying, OK, I'm going to try on.

This this persona of me, and it may be who I am, and it may be that I'm just going to step into this, this.

This sphere and I I find it exciting and I.

And I I think.

That with the.

The tools that life coaches have to help people.

And it's, I think, more older people who are having trouble transitioning into this idea that you don't have to be everything for everybody.

You don't have to.

Be responsible for everybody you can just.

Be responsible for yourself and.

And other people will come alongside you and you can.

Guys can.

You can work together.

It doesn't have to be.

One is versus another.

It can be us moving together for periods of time and then we can interact with other people and.

I think that.

Is pulling us to a world that has like so much more potential for happiness that that elusive?

That elusive quality that people want to experience, but they really don't understand how.

So do you find?

That that people try to come up with ideas for how to find happiness.

Of course, yeah.

I mean, I have to.

I really want to appreciate what you were saying right about the changes that have happened overtime and the culture and I think you make a really good point, although having at one time been kind of a hippie myself, I liked the 70s, but I hear what you're saying.

I think that.

I mean, I think that people.

Are looking for happiness.

People have always looked for happiness, and our definition of what that is has changed over generations.

And I think the belief now is a much broader concept of what hyping happiness might look like.

I think rules that.

We have believed all along culturally are being thrown out and I think that's exciting.

I think that's exciting too.

And that's an interesting.

Point that the kind of the definition.

Of happiness is sort of changing.

I think you're.

You're right on that.

It's not to diminish the hippies either, because I.

Like the hippies.

It was just a time when.

There it was a dichotomy, and there were the hippies.

And then there were the Conservatives and instead of trying to find a way to blend together and.

And to just exist and to appreciate who they were, it was it was conflict.

And I think we're moving away from the conflict part.

Ohh I don't know, I think we're still deep in that.

I think it's really hard for us to move from the dichotomy.

Right, particularly conservatives.

I'm not even going there, but I will say that often it can be a matter of shifting from thinking of it as two completely separate things to both of them under a larger umbrella.

And so sometimes not, not, but.

But yes both.

Is the way to sort of be able to embrace it all and recognize?

How important it?

And that brings me to the point that I think.

We're moving in that direction.

And it.

It feels like.

That to me.

More than I, I think the last few years have shown us that, you know, if you stand on one side or the other.

It it's not going to benefit you.

It's just going to end up causing chaos and destruction in your periphery.

And people are starting it, it's.

It's a small.

Movement, but people seem to be starting to say.

Well, you know.

Maybe both. Maybe neither.

It doesn't really matter to me that much.

Right. I mean.

Relationships are more important to me than where you stand on whatever.

It is that.

You're going to have an opinion on.

Yeah, for some things, I would certainly agree.

I think I'm finding that it's interesting the nonviolent communication material has been really helpful for me in terms of framing things in terms of asking myself.

What are?

What is that person? What are that person's needs? What are they looking for? And that's really the same perspective we take.

Turned inwards with mindful self compassion.

And so there are very difficult things that we all have to deal with because we all suffer, right and being able to acknowledge that you are suffering, that this is hard.

And that we all suffer as part of life.

It's part of living and then being able to ask yourself, what do I need right now?

What do I really need that will move me towards more of what I want and how I want to live?

How I want to show up?

And beginning to take better care of ourselves is really important.

And in learning to do that for ourselves, it reaches out and touches other people and the ripple effect begins to happen, which is.

What's so powerful about?

You know, life coaches out there that are doing the work, like you're doing, that you're showing people how to start with yourself.

Right.

And if if you can heal yourself, or at least give yourself the tools to.

Make decisions that.

Help you live a more satisfying and aligned life.

Then you can move on to.

Helping your children and your grandchildren or your neighbors, or your friends or your spouse or your partner.

Absolutely, yeah.

It just it.

It makes such a huge.

Difference in the ripple effect?

And then in the end, we all get to live in a much better world.

Kind of gentler, more sustainable place.

Exactly. Yeah, that's great.

So when it comes to getting your message out.

What are you doing?

How are you?

How are you getting that?

I'm on this podcast right there you go.

Yeah, I'm so glad that you are.

Me too.

So I do some social media stuff.

A lot of what I do is word of mouth.

I also I teach some short classes, really more like meditation experiences on a platform called Burn along.

Which is.

Ohh gosh, it's a fitness platform.

That offers physical Wellness, nutritional health, mindfulness things.

It's a really interesting platform, so I do that and.

What else do I do?

I work part time at lira.

Which I really love.

And again, lots of word of mouth clients.

The other thing I've tried is there's a platform called Sharewell which is a peer support group and they offer different groups.

By different people.

And that's been a lot of fun.

I do a couple of classes on there as well.

And I do a little bit of just plain marketing, right, networking.

And so on, yeah.

Very cool, very cool.

And what is?

Your biggest success do you think?

Ohh, that's a great question.

I mean what comes to mind immediately is some clients I've worked with who have just had incredible changes in their lives.

You know, a couple in particular came in one woman.

Wanted to be able to keep up with her paperwork was her original goal and in the process of coaching she has really transformed aspects of her life that she didn't even think would ever change.

And it's so exciting to watch people not striving to be.

Different, but being able to blossom into more of.

Who they are.

It is just a treat.

That is so special that is so special.

So do what's the one thing you.

Want people to take away from this conversation today?

I would say to recognize that working with a coach doesn't mean you're broken.

It doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you that it just means you want things.

You wanna keep growing, learning and developing, and that that is a lifelong process.

That we don't ever get to a point where we're like.

OK, now I'm done.

I'm happy I'm good cause life doesn't work like that.

We can always learn more.

And if they're interested in working with me, of course that I'm available.

And that they can contact me.

And how would they do that?

Through my website you can message me there you can schedule a free consultation.

You can e-mail me and I think you're going to share some links.

Right?

I'm on LinkedIn.

I'm on Facebook.

I'm on.

Instagram, although I don't do a whole lot there, I'm on all the things.

So and actually you can Google my name.

And it particularly if you want to add Savannah, GA. But even without that, I pretty much come up, there are not a lot of Falster Lucini's running around.

I noticed that when.

I was looking for you.

It has been our pleasure having you on the show today.

Thank you so much for joining us.

Be sure to like and subscribe to the podcast too, so you don't miss any of the episodes coming up.

Right.

Thank you so much for having me.

I love what you're doing with this.

It's so powerful and amazing.